Young boys are calves just like those young geese in the previous chapter. They don’t know how to show interest, so they stamp their feet as a sign of admiration. But as a start it’s not bad, because the key is really that interest. So neither muscles, nor car, nor expensive clothes, but real or at least genuinely shown interest! But it would be necessary to go a little further, to cultivate that interest a little, by being a gentleman. That’s what this is all about! Oh, and hygiene too – or if you smell like a pig, you have a map of the world and adjacent galaxies in your armpits, your hair is greasy, you just look like a homeless, so forget everything written here! Women orient themselves mostly by smell and after a week you won’t be able to figure it out for pheromones!
I repeat myself, nothing strange at my age, but again for maximum correctness = it is a proven fact that women look at us much more than we look at them! They just have wider peripheral vision and we don’t have the insight to register it. In short, we have to stare directly at them and for a long time, which is why we are so easily detectable. And ultimately, because women know how not to be detected. A woman looks slightly off to the side and for a shorter period of time, but still our figure, smile, eyes, hair, etc (oh and especially our ass – did you know that women mainly peek at our ass?!?) are all carefully scanned, assessed and scored. Priorities vary and of course change a bit over time, but basically it’s snooping. So, really, are we perverts, how we are always looking at women?!?!? Of course, we stare at beauty and with unplayed admiration and longing; they just plain stare and mostly criticize too…we just drool…well, and they go „by smell“, really…
One friendly warning, and this despite the fact that I fully realize that if you lift weights, you have trouble even reading the title of this slim little book! But my point is that if you are lifting those stupid dumbbells, either those young geese or those frozen geese, the dumbest ones, will fly at you. And if you are already around forty, then watch out, because there are usually (in the first case) severe punishments for that, or good night, uncle pedo! And for the second type – well, actually…good for you!
The second trick, necessary for gallantry, is flattery. Guys, realize you can’t overshoot! What do I mean? Well – the average intelligent guy (biceps-triceps…just sepsis aside), when he knows he has a paunch and some chick tells him he has a nice figure, he just feels weird and doubtful. But then he thinks, after giving it some thought, well, okay, at least she likes me, so fine, but I don’t really have a nice figure. I should lose that pot belly, though. Well – the average intelligent guy (biceps-triceps…just sepsis aside), when he knows he has a pimple and some chick tells him he has a nice figure, he just feels weird and doubtful. But then he thinks, after giving it some thought, well, okay, at least she likes me, so fine, but I don’t really have a nice figure. I should lose that pot belly, though. But when you have a woman who has an ass like an old mare and you tell her she has a nice ass, she really believes it and she wants to hear it all the time! So any superlative, even for the ugliest face that wouldn’t fit in a cottage without a man having to be ashamed of it, when you tell her she’s beautiful, she thinks she really is! Seriously, they’re all out of their minds like that, or at least in that way! So really watch out for the typical male reaction = if you think you’re fat, you probably are, don’t ask me!
And if you’re a nerd like me and feel that you’re actually lying to a woman with your exaggerated flattery, then know that we’re lying to at least both sexes to each other. But I dare say they lie to us a lot more. The argument can be made that women behave in such a way as to attract us. And they do it by doing what has worked for them for centuries = subconsciously or unconsciously behaving in such a way, or more accurately, „giving the impression“ that they are easily available, accessible and compliant to sex and that the sex will be the most amazing thing you have ever known in your life. And the reality? Shit!
I want to discuss sex in a separate chapter, but here I will use one of my experiences as an explanation that this advice is not 100%. I remind you that the woman decides how it turns out! So, unfortunately, even if you don’t stink, you may not get it, but the odds definitely increase. So anyway, I was driving a comrade like a bear on a road trip, we went to several places, crossing back and forth on the Sazava. We had lunch, and then we had a dinner or a snack… And what did you think when we came home? I was expecting that what I had sort of worked off would now be returned to me. So I found out she was tired, she had a headache, and if I would drive her home, and it was shit. I went to bed with a hard-on. The worst part is that the women are really convinced that if I take them on a trip that it’s a huge honor. Shit! They don’t even realize that we do these situations where we make a fool of ourselves, we do this shit that we’re like not totally bothered by or sometimes actually bothered by, but we definitely don’t do it because we want to, we do it as sort of a prelude to sex because we just expect to fuck for it logically! And as an afterthought and confirmation that this is the case – she wonders to this day why I don’t want to go on trips with her anymore when it was so nice!!! It was, but for whom?!?
So it’s actually very simple, dear Wattson! Approach every bone that’s the least bit touchable. Speak in a deeper, calmer voice. Look her in the eye and ask her out for a coffee (not exactly like a beer in a pub, I guess) or a walk, just be active. Know that as you get older, the success rate increases. You’ll find that those much-feared rejections are at a bare minimum. Just don’t give a shit about all the different dating books, all the imitation, the non-verbal communication, shit, fuck it! Go into it with a smile, nice = hello, you look nice, I’m inviting you for coffee. I’d love to have coffee with you. And if not? Then think (don’t say it – it’s pointless and besides you don’t know if this NO will be a YES tomorrow) kiss my ass, I’ll ask here next! It’s enough that this bitch didn’t see it, or at least the new one didn’t see that I approached her second. Because that’s the competition as well. Ladies want to be the first and only princess. She herself has two bastards with different guys, but for you to be a princess = how pathetic!!!
And finally, and to put my mind at rest – I know they say that some people wash and some people perfume, but sorry, like, deodorant is really a necessity these days! No, you’re not going to be a pussy, and believe me, it really isn’t true that a proper man smells and fucks – that would make the best man a hedgehog!!! It doesn’t have to be perfume. I know it’s a dumb thing to say, but for some ladies there’s the term „too fragrant“… And then there’s chewing gum, if you want to be a megaprofessional, have it a while before the meeting and throw it away right before the meeting so you don’t chew like a moron. But mostly calm = I’m writing all this here so that you don’t discourage and it’s not a shame for a woman to go out with you – otherwise I remind you, she chooses you, not you her…so it’s just for her to choose you at all, otherwise you’re out of luck…And I don’t have to write about regular brushing and flossing, do I? What about mouthwash? I don’t give a shit, do I? 😀